The Health Blog

LOVE AFTER SIXTY

Sexual activity does not stop at the age of sixty, though young people often find it hard to imagine that their parents still make love. And parents, for their part, are often embarrassed to let their children think they still enjoy a sexual relationship.

It would be wrong to try and define what love after sixty should be like. One does not become a “senior citizen” all of a sudden. Ageing is a steady, gradual process that takes place throughout one’s life. The frequency of intercourse slows down long before sixty, partly because of the body’s ageing but also due to psychological reasons and a certain slackening of the sex drive.

In any case less frequent lovemaking may be better quality lovemaking. In place of the fiery passion of youth, there is now a better knowledge of what pleases a lover, a better control of impulses, a different sexual behaviour pattern in which eroticism plays a more important part.

They advantage of old age is also its great drawback: the refusal to accept one’s age. People try to hold on as long as possible to the belief that they are young, and worry when their sex life cannot keep pace.

Wisdom would advise against trying to continue beating records. Whatever your age, you should make love when you feel like it and only when you feel like it.

The post-sixty years are also the time when physiological events have an impact on sexual activity. The menopause for women, prostate trouble for men, circulation problems for both. Operations. Illness weakens you more, and for longer, than when you were twenty.

But it is not enough to submit to these problems as if they were unavoidable. Medical science can help, and no one should feel afraid (or ashamed) to consult their doctor about sexual problems. Impotence, for example, is no longer incurable. It may be caused by arteries in bad condition. It can be cured by a suitable diet together with a drug treatment free of side-effects. Hormone deficiency is another possible cause. There are tests to identify testosterone deficiency, and the hormone balance can be restored by appropriate treatment.

In point of fact, once one has reached one’s sixties, with children and grandchildren, a host of other things become more important than one’s sex life. And no doubt this is as it should be.

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